jocularity

[kidoggy]

A Catholic priest, a Protestant minister, and a Jewish rabbi were discussing when life begins.

“Life begins,” said the priest, “at the moment of fertilization. That is when God instills the spark of life into the fetus.”

“We believe,” said the minister, “that life begins at birth, because that is when the baby becomes an individual and is capable of making its own decisions and must learn about sin.”

“You’re both wrong,” said the rabbi. “Life begins when the children have graduated from college and moved out of the house.”

 

[kidoggy]

They told me that if I didn't have a mask all I had to do was pull my t-shirt up over my nose when I go to the grocery store.
They LIED.
You need to be wearing pants and shoes, too.

 

[kidoggy]

Remember--the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your appearance, lack of talent, and general personality.

 

[kidoggy]

'any body else think it would be hillarious if biden picked a white woman for his VP??


there sure would be a lot of butthurt rioters.

 

[kidoggy]

If oil prices go any lower, Exxon Mobile might have to lay off some members of Congress

 

[kidoggy]

So there's an Amazon River now?

What's next, Lake Facebook and Mount PayPal?

 

[Hilltop]

Need to watch with the volume up.

 

[kidoggy]

 

[kidoggy]

If anyone actually believed the polls,

there would be no rioting.

 

[kidoggy]

Trump vs Biden

From the oval office to a herd of reporters who hate him.
"Make America great again."

From his basement to softball questions:
"C'mon man."

 

[kidoggy]

Little johnny comes home and proudly

to his parents, "Mom, dad, the teacher asked the class a question today and I was the only one who knew the right answer!"

The parents are very happy and ask, "That's amazing johnny! And what was the question?"

Puffing out his chest, johnny says, "Who farted?"

 

[kidoggy]

Sure fire way to reduce your chances of dying from Covid-19 ....

Play Russian roulette.

 

[kidoggy]

How do you make a liberal laugh on Saturday?

Tell him/her a joke on Tuesday.

 

[kidoggy]

Quid Pro Joe the masked candidate

 

[kidoggy]

My boss just asked, "Do you think you can come in on Saturday this week? I know you enjoy your weekends, but I need you here."

I replied, "Yeah, no problem. I'll probably be late though as the public transport is bad on weekends."

He said, "Okay, when do you think you'll get here then?"

I said, "Monday."

 

[kidoggy]

I don't know what the complaint is with USPS
My bills always show up right on time .



you'd think a guy with a mail order bride
would have a bit more respect for the US Postal Service

 

[kidoggy]

An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God ."

No one moved.

The preacher continued, “Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.”

Again, all were quiet.

Then, slowly, a gorgeous blonde stood up with her head bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, “Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.”

 

[kidoggy]

This is going to be the first year our family won’t be going to Hawaii because of COVID-19.

Usually it’s because we can’t afford it.

 

[kidoggy]

If you won Powerball one day, would you mail the
ticket in, or would you bring it in person....and why?

Remember that when you vote.

 

[kidoggy]

We should stop getting mad at lazy people....

They didn't do anything.