jocularity
- Thread starter kidoggy
- Start date
JimP
Administrator
JimP
Administrator
NEW SPECIAL FORCES UNIT
The U.S. Army announced today the formation of a new 900-man elite fighting unit, called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These Mountain and Southern boys will be dropped off in Iraq and Syria with plenty of cold beer, hunting rifles, ammo and Ford F-350 Super Duty Pickups. They have been given only the following facts about ISIS:
1. The season opened today.
2. There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken
4. They hate beer, bacon, BBQ, pickups, nude women, rednecks, country music and Jesus.
AND
5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.
The Pentagon expects the ISIS problem to be over by next Friday about noon.
The U.S. Army announced today the formation of a new 900-man elite fighting unit, called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These Mountain and Southern boys will be dropped off in Iraq and Syria with plenty of cold beer, hunting rifles, ammo and Ford F-350 Super Duty Pickups. They have been given only the following facts about ISIS:
1. The season opened today.
2. There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken
4. They hate beer, bacon, BBQ, pickups, nude women, rednecks, country music and Jesus.
AND
5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.
The Pentagon expects the ISIS problem to be over by next Friday about noon.
JimP
Administrator
dirtclod Az.
Veteran member
heck ,I just figure it'd still be the best I got that day.Kidoggy if thats his mother I want no part of that!!!
A doctor was holding a new baby that he had justdelivered.
The baby looked up at him and said, “Are you my father?”
The doctor said, “No, I am the doctor that delivered you.”
Then the doctor handed the baby to the nurse.
While the nurse was cleaning the baby the baby looked at the nurse and said, “Are you my father?”
The nurse said, “No, I am just the nurse.”
Then the nurse gave the baby to the new father.
The baby looked at him and said, “Are you my father?”
The new father said proudly, “Yes! I am your father.”
Then the baby started poking his father in the forehead over and over again and said, “So how do YOU like it?!”
The baby looked up at him and said, “Are you my father?”
The doctor said, “No, I am the doctor that delivered you.”
Then the doctor handed the baby to the nurse.
While the nurse was cleaning the baby the baby looked at the nurse and said, “Are you my father?”
The nurse said, “No, I am just the nurse.”
Then the nurse gave the baby to the new father.
The baby looked at him and said, “Are you my father?”
The new father said proudly, “Yes! I am your father.”
Then the baby started poking his father in the forehead over and over again and said, “So how do YOU like it?!”
dirtclod Az.
Veteran member
simply the reason GOD invented the light switch.Kidoggy thats just yucky!
cmoan baby , light mah fire!
Last edited:
dirtclod Az.
Veteran member
Bonecollector
Veteran member
lol... ya . getting a lil sick ,even for me..
but you gotta admit that ,"c(um)moan baby." line was pure comedy genius!!
Bonecollector
Veteran member
dirtclod Az.
Veteran member
Two brothers are running a farm.
One day the first brother walks into the barn and notices his brother at the back of the barn dancing in front of the tractor. Quietly he walks closer and peaks around the corner notices his brother slowly taking off his shirt while dancing.
He interrupts his dancing brother and asks what is he doing.
The dancing brother quickly puts his shirt back on and says...
I went to the doctors because me and the Mrs. were having marital problems and the doctor told me to do something sexy to attract her.
One day the first brother walks into the barn and notices his brother at the back of the barn dancing in front of the tractor. Quietly he walks closer and peaks around the corner notices his brother slowly taking off his shirt while dancing.
He interrupts his dancing brother and asks what is he doing.
The dancing brother quickly puts his shirt back on and says...
I went to the doctors because me and the Mrs. were having marital problems and the doctor told me to do something sexy to attract her.