jocularity

kidoggy

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An invisible man and an invisible woman got married. I'm not sure what they saw in each other. Their kids were nothing to look at, either.


though one was elected to the presidency.
his administration was transparent.
 
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kidoggy

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Pulled out a couple of nose hairs to see if it hurts.

Judging by the reaction of the man asleep next to me on the plane, it seems extremely painful.
 

kidoggy

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A coworker of mine comes up to me
He says, “What’s up man? I have a question for you”

“Ok” I reply

“Imagine you go camping with some other guys. One night you all are doing a lot of drinking. You wake up in the morning with your pants down to your ankles and Vaseline in your butthole. Would you tell any body about that?” He asks

“Hell no!” I answer

“Great” he says. “Wanna go camping?
 
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kidoggy

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Dentist
"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth," the woman told her dentist.
He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."
 

kidoggy

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I was waiting at a bus stop when

a gust of wind blew a young lady's skirt up over her head. "Rather airy, isn't it?" I asked. She turned to me and replied "What the hell did you expect, feathers?"
 
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kidoggy

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I can’t stand homeless people

Every time I leave work, one of them approaches me and shakes his can full of coins just to show off how he has more money than me.
 

kidoggy

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my girlfriend got a zombie tattoo on her hoohaw.
when I asked her why , she said because it eats your brain.


she was correct . I love feeding the zombie!
 

kidoggy

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Teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s 2 plus 2?

He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “4?”.
She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s 3 plus 3? ”.
He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “6?”.She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s 5 plus 5?”.
He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven?”.
 
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kidoggy

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Yesterday I paid a stranger to

knock me unconscious, shove a foreign object up my butt and film the whole thing.

Or as my doctor insists on calling it, a colonoscopy