A minister, a priest and a rabbit walk into a bar. The bartender takes drink orders from the minister and the priest, then asks the rabbit "What are you doing here?". The rabbit replies " I don't know - I'm only here because of auto-correct!".
I recently entered a competition to see who’s gained the most weight and lost the most hair. Obviously it wasn’t called that, it was advertised as a ‘High School Reunion’.
A guy goes into the doctors complaining about his hearing.
"Could you describe the symptoms?" the doctor asks.
"Yeah sure" the guy replies "Homer is a bald, fat, yellow guy and Marge is a skinny woman with blue hair"