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Thread: jocularity

  1. #731
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    Taxes
    A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
    AS GOES THE CHURCH, SO GOES THE NATION

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  3. #732
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    Two engineers meet each other on their way into work .

    One of them has a new bike, and the other one asks where he got it.

    "Well," the first one says, "it's the funniest story. I was in the park yesterday and a beautiful woman rode up to me, threw down her bike, ripped off her clothes, and said 'Take what you want. '"

    "Good choice," said the other engineer, "the clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
    AS GOES THE CHURCH, SO GOES THE NATION

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  5. #733
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    If you don't care where you are, you are not lost....

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  7. #734
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    A fellow comes to confession. "Father," he said, "forgive me for I have sinned."

    The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?"

    "I lusted," the fellow replied.

    "Tell me about it," the priest said.

    The fellow then related his story. "Father, I am a delivery man for UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in the affluent section of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened and there stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She had long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds. She was dressed in a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked if I would like to come in."

    "And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest.

    "Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how I lusted," replied the man.

    "Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will get your reward in heaven, my son."

    "A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?" the fellow asked.

    The priest replied, "I think a bale of hay would be appropriate, you dumb jackass."
    AS GOES THE CHURCH, SO GOES THE NATION

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  9. #735
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    My wife said, "Whisper dirty things into my ear."
    I said, "Kitchen, bathroom, living room...................................."
    AS GOES THE CHURCH, SO GOES THE NATION

 

 
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